There is a common belief that all long-distance relationships are doomed. That being apart must mean the death of love and companionship as well. However, not only are long-distance relationships possible, they can thrive as well as any relationship without the added distance.
Of course, all relationships have challenges of their own. But long-distance relationships have an additional challenge which cannot be ignored. It takes more effort than your regular relationships and can become a problem if you are not mentally prepared to handle one.
You may see a close friend hanging out with their partner and regret that you don’t have the opportunity to be as close. Your friends and family may even actively discourage you from pursuing a relationship with thousands of kilometres in between. But you need to remember that distance is but a small hurdle. Here are four tips if you really want to make you long-distance relationship work.
So you cannot hang out at your local coffee shop, but it doesn’t mean you stop communicating. In the digital age, long-distance relationships are easier than ever. With the click of a button, you can see their face on a video call. Talk to them on texts and calls. It is key to replace the physical distance with virtual closeness.
Don’t be clingy
This is the exact opposite of the first situation. You may find yourself unable to text and call, expecting to know where they are, with who they are hanging out and so on. Excessive communication shows insecurity. You are supposed to communicate but not keep a tab on your partner like a prisoner. Be secure about your bond and let each other be loved and not possessed. Go spend time with your friends instead and let them breathe.
Forget the dark ages when you needed to be in close proximity with your loved one to have common hobbies. Use the internet for something other than stalking your partner’s social check-ins. Watch a movie together, go on a virtual date, or even exercise “together” (at the same time, and let them know). Take part in each other’s hobbies and share pictures and videos. Choose a book or a show that both of you will enjoy and do it “together.”
Have clear expectations
If you are both able to, then plan a schedule where you visit each-other every few months. Don’t expect the other to magically know if you can or cannot do it. Be clear about how much communication you want, how much you want to spend (in case of visiting), or if you both are mentally prepared to carry this out long-term.